Ellie Goulding. Latest Obsession.

Guns And Horses.

You're so quiet
But it doesn't phase me
You're on time
You move so fast, makes me feel lazy

And let's join forces
We've got our guns and horses
I know you've been burned by every fire is a lesson learned

I left my house
I left my clothes
Door wide open
Heaven knows
You're so worth it, you are

But I wish I could feel all it for you
I wish I could be it all for you
If I could erase the pain
And maybe you'd feel the same
I'd do it all for you
I would

Let's tie words
'Cause they amount to nothing
Play it down
Pretend you can't take what you've found
But you found me
On a screen you sit at permanently

I left my house
I left my clothes
Door wide open
Heaven knows
You're so worthy, you are

But I wish I could feel all it for you
I wish I could be it all for you
If I could erase the pain
And maybe you'd feel the same
I'd do it all for you
I would

It's time to come clean
And make sense of everything
It's time that we found out who we are
Cause when I'm standing here in the dark
I see your face in every star

But I wish I could feel all it for you
I wish I could be it all for you
If I could erase the pain
And maybe you'd feel the same
I'd do it all for you
I would
I'd do it all for you, I would

Can I just be her? Or atleast have her voice.

Shiz Happens

Alright. So the other night I get a call from my bestie Amanda. Her car had broken down on the cursed Hwy 20. I personally have always hated that road. Any way I go down there to help Amanda, we get in my car and go to the QT down the street and put gas in a little gas can., go back to her car and put in the gas. Her car starts up! Yay! So I go back to my car and it wont start..... It killed itself. The battery could take  no more. Amanda looks in her car for jumper cables, cause they are always in there! Well tonight at two in the morning they aren't. So we had to go to her house in her car to get the jumper cables. While on our way to get back to my car the song walking on sunshine comes on. The original, good version. This one Walking on Sunshine . Now doesn't that sound like the world is taking a crap on us and making fun of us? ......yeah we sang along anyway! Cause it's one of the best songs ever!  Take that world! Well we got back to my car and jumped it. After three times of jumping it my car finnaly stays on and works. Happy ending, we both made it home!
Part two! The next day! 
So Saturday we were both bored. Finally at like six we figured we would go out to eat. We headed up to chedders because I had never been there before. While on our way there it starts poring down rain, after a few months with out rain we needed it but really? all at once? that was had to drive in. Oh well It felt good. Of course being a Saturday night and getting there at 6:30 it's packed! We waited a good 25min. And finally got a booth, facing the window. Which was funny cause I was saying how thats what I wanted and that we would probably get a table in the middle of the room. But the food was good :) I approve of Chedders now. After Chedders we went to Starship records On 15th And Lewis. I love that store. Really I do it's just not in the best area. Like I would never go there alone at night. So I was looking at some shiz and this Effing Juggelo freak comes up to me and was all like Hi, Youre really pretty whats your name? Normally I wouldnt have cared but he had wads of cash in his hand. He thought I was an effing prostitute. He continues to try and get me to go to this party because It's his friends birthday and there will be jegger shots blahblahblah and he keeps calling me beautiful and sweet talking. Honestly I felt so dirty at that point. He was very persistant and even got his female friend to try and get my number. Gross. I gave them a fake name and everything. I knew he thought I was a prostitiute. It was just awful. How degrading is that? Thanks alot random douche. Like I said on my facebook, You better have more money then Bill Gates and Oprah, combined On the spot, in cash bitch. Im not a prostitute. Needless to say we got what I needed and got the eff outta there. That has never happened to me in that store before. I love that place.  But really?
Part three! So far today.....
So this morning I woke up to Why aren't you at church whats wrong with you? Now put that in every word form possible and repeat 20Xs each. I finnaly got so Tired of it and told Taylor, Ethan and my dad to shut the hell up. I hate it when they do that. They always judge me and assume they are better then me becuase they go to church. Newsflash you aren't. And now I shall go to Julies and make dinner for them :)

Oklahoma sometimes turns out to be a pretty cool place.

I hate to admit it but sometimes Oklahoma can really amaze me. It can be random yellow lightning or a freaking tunnel made of trees or some beautiful view of some stupid piece of land that just makes me want to stay in that place forever. Yes this will be a damn happy blog, next to no cussing. But it was an amazing day and I just have to share it. So there i was sitting at home bored and Amanda texts me and asks if I want to go swimming. I told her hell yeah! But that we needed to go to Bluehole. Amanda had never been to Bluehole so I told her we had to go for sure. Bluehole is about an hour away from where we live. We headed out at around two in the after noon. We saw some wierd things on our way, like a pink house, and a hotdog putting on its own mustard, and a house with potty chairs and walkers as their front yard decor. You know you're in Oklahoma when you see potty chairs and walkers as decor. Any way we got lost. We ended up on this dirt road with a billion tree tunnels! Tree tunnels are those trees that surround the road and lean over the road to where it makes a tunnel.... get it? well they are my favorite thing to drive through. Tree tunnels make me happy and appriciate nature. For some wierd reason... Well we follow this dirt road for too long and finally deside to turn around, in this rednecks yard. He sees us and asks where we're going or what we're looking for. I said We need to get to Bluehole. He steps out of his car and is wearing no shirt, and booty shorts. Shorty short shorts. Redneck. He was really nice though and told us exactly how to get to bluehole! We ended up getting there a few mins. later. Moral of the story so far as Amanda put it, Always trust rednecks in booty shorts and no shirt. Any way we get there and its just gorgeous there. There will be a picture in this general area if I get this right.... And now is the part where I will post a bunch of pictures and tell stories. underneath the picture. Jk Some of them wont have explainations becuase this is screwing up. So just look at the damn pictures and be jealous you weren't there. :) Hahaha. Over all it was a great day, That I really needed. Thank you Amanda for putting up with me! I love you! Oh and I hope you liked this Brittney. ;) This one is all for you!

BlueHole.

Shadow pictures are always a good way to go.

I am a crazy person.



lazily drifting with the current.



We got this floaty from a family whose kid cracked his head open. nbd.

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Clear water is the best. And a rare find in the OK.

 Well, Let me post this and start a new blog..... I guess I have too many pictures......

True Friends.

How does she put up with me?

These next two blogs are dedicated to two of my best friends in the intire world. People that I know will always be there for me here in Oklahoma Or where ever I end up going. The first is Amanda H. Yes. That is her on the left mooning me. And yes, That is me in a bra. We are just that good of friends. This girl right here has helped me through so much in my life.She will never know how much I appriciate her. She is alway there when ever I need her. We always start our days when we hang out by bitching to each other. I know that sounds weired but honestly I think it helps alot, we just bitch and get it out of our system. No matter how wimpy and stupid my bitching is she always listens to me. Amanda is my hero. My insparation. She has been through so much in her life and I really do look up to her. And she's gorgeous. But that's a given. We have had so many crazy times together. Like the time we got chased down by that cowboy on the highway.... or the time the old man followed us back to owasso on the high way and took pictures of us. Total creeper. Or all those photography adventures. I always made Amanda be my model for photography class. I swear everytime we go some where something out of the ordinary, creepy, or just halarious happens to us! She is seriously my best friend and I wouldn't trade her for the world. Now just to be a weirdo and end up embarrassing myself her are more pictures that always make me smile.

SunShine.

Hi I'm Queersten.

Bitches. :)

Summer time And the livin's easy.

Dear lord my hair. haha

Nose ring. I was jealous.

Summer Drives to No where.

Tanning is important.

Oh goodness. Actually, we take some nice pictures. Hopefully I'm not embarrassing Amanda. This is my best friend though. I wanted to do this because recently she helped me through something kinda big and she saw me cry. And you all know that I Do Not cry. I have told Amanda everything And I trust her with my life. I love that we have a super honest friendship, and when I say that I mean blunt. For real. We can say anything to eachother and be compleatly fine. "Kirsten, shut-up!" hahaha Okay. "No those clothes do not work, take them off and burn them!" You sure? "Yes." I'm pretty sure we have never argued or gotten into any fights. She's been a real friend to me. A true friend. Thank you for everything that you have ever done, you're the best and I love you!

I don't cry.

Family.
You tell me I dress like a slut.
Well atleast I have style.
You say I am stupid.
I have common sense.
"You're making a bad choice by hanging out with Them."
"I accept people for who they are and don't judge Them."
You're going to hell.
I'll see you there.
Why are you going inactive?
Because I don't want to be forced to believe in what you do.
Why can't you be like.......
You don't see them outside of thier "perfect" church attire.
Why don't you listen to us?
I take your words into consideration.
What is wrong with you?
I'm just finding myself, sorry you hate it.
Why don't you leave?
Believe me I want to.
Kirsten, Why do you act like this?
I guess I learned from the best.
I don't cry.
But maybe I should.



This isn't even half of what I hear all the time. I am getting so tired of this shit. Everyone needs to feel loved especially from thier family. Currently I am not getting that. All of these things that were said I have heard from my mom, dad, grandpa and brothers. Rediculous and shouldn't happen. This is not okay. People keep telling me that I can cry about it or I can just not give a fuck. Well I don't cry. And sometimes I do give a fuck. Surprise surprise, Kirsten cares. But I don't care enough to cry. Tomorrow's a new day and it will start all over again. I am a slut. I am a druggie. I am stupid. I am not wanted. I am a terrible person. Please start new rumors so I don't have to hear these ones again. They are getting old and quite frankly my dear I don't give a damn. Be creative this time though. Or donate money to the Get Kirsten out of Oklahoma Fund. If you want me gone help me out bitches. Then I will be gone so fast and you wont ever have to hear from me again. I believe this is the part I am supposed to go get high or cut myself or something..... wait, I don't really do that. Good night.

Hunter's intense therapy notes

In other words Hunters notes she took at 4am talking to me. Thought they were funny so i'll share.
*warning there are mistakes in her but we will not fix them because it makes it genuine. :)

She’s feel tired and dizzy.

Crazy girl – she makes you cry. And she’s sexy (of course)

                You love her to death. (But no interpersonal feelings)

                She’s a “man”, no problems with being a man. She has a problem with saying “cock”. Naughty word.

Her life sucks balls. Why is she a failure? She has no social life. She works over 40 hours a week.

She likes her job, because…. Amazing manager. Lots of money.

She doesn’t like her job because… “cleaning up piss”. The hours suck.

Whitney, (“Titney”) NO DRAMA, just problems.  She threating  to write her up. She doesn’t listen, she’s “fat”, she’s “fat” (AGAIN), and she’s fat and fat and rude. And fat. And she’s short.

She doesn’t like commitment. Yes to Hookups. Longest relationship, 1 month. No forreal bf.

No right boys… all them cute ones. NO COMMINTMENT. (EW)

p.s. I am a robot.

Likes to beep. Won’t stop laughing. PENISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Yes – to commitment.  (RANDOM BOY)

Blah blah blah blah blah spikey hair. Only like boys for appearance. (but funny)

Huge on appearance… Shallow. In denial.

Still in denial. Cute with a lazy eye is NOT awesome. (Lucy)

Always will be shallow. Still in denial. Crazy, thinks I can talk to possums?

The only guy she legit dated…

HATES ZAC EFRON… she’s gotta go.

“I can’t fall in love with an animal”

Travie McCoy:

Summer cabin. In the dark abyss. Catching fireflies. Next to the ocean. He turns around & slaps you. You say WHY DID YOU DO THAT? He says YO UGLY. AND STUPID. I FREAKING HATE YOU.

Random Guy with Lazy Eye:                                                                                                                    

Summer Cabin. In the dark abyss. Catching fireflies. Next to the ocean. You turn around & slap him. He says WHY DID YOU DO THAT? You say YO UGLY. AND STUPID. I FREAKING HATE YOU. He says, girl I aint got no money, I aint got no car to take you on a date. I can’t even buy you flowers. But together we can be the perfect soul mates. Talk to me girl. & you say, baby it’s alright now you aint got to flaunt it for me. You know that you can still touch my love it’s free. We can work without the books just you and me. Thuggin it out until we get it right. And he says, hey baby I’m going to get some surgery work done to fix my lazy eye. & I just joined the NBA and I’ll be getting paper. You say, I BET YOU CAN’T SING THOUGH. He says, naaa I just got a record deal with chris brown baby. We be gettin paper boo.

Which would you choose            

I'm not sure if this is finished.

This is dedicated to my Utah roomies, My Mos, Haleigh, and Ali. Before I start I would like to say that since I no longer live with them, this blog shall be full of grammatical errors. Deal with it! J

 So I don’t really know where to start, maybe I should say where I am because it’s not home. I am currently at work, there is no one here. I am listening to 90’s music and singing along to my childhood.

 Funny story about work yesterday, I traded shifts with another girl, I was supposed to open so when we switched I closed, damn I am the story master! No detail left unsaid! Well I had been hanging out with Amanda and Hunter the night before and we were partying it up ya know Facebook creepin very late at night. So I agreed, I was like yeah I’ll trade! Just more time to creep on people and girl talk, or whatever. Hunter is not yet 18 or I’m sure we would’ve gone to the District night club. Mmmmm.  Any way I thought we were all set and I get a call at 8am saying, your stores not open. I was like fuhhhh. So I jumped out of the bed like a freakin super hero on an adrenaline high (no sleep will do that) And raced to work! I had a late open. Poop. My first one ever. But I don’t blame the other girl at all she’s been having a very hard time lately. I still love that girl!

 So my morning went like this, late open, then I turned into a CNA.  Do you know what cna’s do? Well they clean up all the bodily fluids of old people who cannot control themselves or their bladder. This sweet lady came in (50 years old…..) I got her all set up in her tanning bed and sent her to the room. No one else was coming in so I decided to creep on her comments in the computer. Of course FIVE of the comments were “make sure to take out the trash can in her room she pees in them.” Can I add right here that these trash cans are little baby trash cans? The ones you have to put your foot on a pedal to open….. I was like fuhhhhh. She best not piss in this trash can.

Meanwhile my dear sweet dad comes in and brings me breakfast. Homemade chocolate chip pancakes. J <3 love him.

So we’re chattin’ it up about random shiz while I was reading these comments and I go dad…. Who the hell thinks its okay to pee in a trash can? His answer “Tanner, or wait, was that Bryson?” (My younger brothers.) So we laughed and I was like no dad for real, look at these comments. He read them and said, “Kirsten if she does you need to call her (in case she leaves) and tell her she needs to get her butt back here and clean up her piss.” So I said dad I don’t know how to do that. How would you tell someone, I mean doesn’t everyone know that’s inappropriate and discussing?

  No this lady did not understand this extraterrestrial conception. I mean she’s the normal one here, why doesn’t everyone just pee in trash cans? Good lord it’s just so much easier than walking 7 doors down to have a real full sized toilet.  I have to admit though, these things are small, and she had to have some talent…. Unless she was really a man. Hahahaha! What a laugh!

NO but for real after she left I checked the trash can and there was trash in it and I didn’t see any liquid. I was happy, and then I took a closer look and saw droplets on the paper that was in there…. I took the bag and began to lift it…. It was heavy with effin’ piss. The trash that was in there had floated to the top covering the pee like haha you can’t see me and you’ll never know who did this or why it smells like piss. Well I found your trick immature BZ. I Kirsten Williams had to clean up an old woman’s piss because she could not walk 7 doors down to the toilet. Oh and I mentioned before that this was her 6^th time doing it. Right?  I work in a tanning salon BZ, not a freakin’ nursing home. I refuse to clean up piss again. It’s wrong and gross. Besides I’m not even licensed to clean up biohazards material. END!

My first customer of the day finally came in, two hours after I get here; she’s one of my favorites. So nice and never pees in trash cans! Well now that we’re on the subject of strange things that happen to me at work, let’s go to when I worked in Tulsa stores for two weeks. (I think I shall draw pictures for this blog just for you guys because I have been a slacker.) But I will do those when I arrive home.

So. Tulsa stores are very different. Let me give you an example, in general Owasso is all oh I love you, we’re residential and peaceful and nothing goes down and we just have a movie theater and bowling alley for entertainment , keepin it safe! J Now Tulsa, Tulsa is more like, “don’t give me attitude I’ve got my own!  Boom Bitch stay outta my f****n’ way! I am a total bad ass and do whatever I want and don’t give a “bad word that shall be censored” Clubbin’!” ;)  (Winking smile cause Tulsa is a flirty slut.) Haha Tulsa….. I heard this week that it’s the 28^th most violent city in the U of S. Fun fact for ya.

 Well, I was at the 21^st and Yale store just Chilin. My permanent store is Owasso but someone quit so I got to cover her shifts. Back round story complete! I swear.

So here I was in one of the Tulsa stores (21st) and this lesbian couple…. Partner? Comes in. one of the girls wants to do a regular tan then go into a spay tan, that is common so she and her girl get out and the other one goes into the spay tan. The spay tan only takes like one min. she pops back up and they’re talking, the girl that came out of the spray tan hadn’t put her bra back on… besides announcing it to everyone you could tell. She proceeds to tell her girl toy…. (Gag) that the spray tan leaves no lines what so ever. For some reason she had to prove it as well. Yes, she pulled her shirt completely up and just kept her boobs up and out for everyone to see for a good min. while her girlfriend is examining them extra closely talking about biting….. Yeah… I kind of ignore from then on. Gross. But I mean if they are happy, who am I to judge, plus it makes my life seem like things actually happen. Haha.

What else happened in Tulsa…? Oh I seriously had a 20min chat with this new customer! I love her to death! She was the one that said “You know what they say about girls with big feet, it really hurts when they kick your ass.” Oh Miss Josie, she was quite adorable.

Ms. Peeinthetrashcan is tanning….. There is no trash can in there with her. I’m kind of scared she’s going to pee somewhere else now. Like the floor or behind the bed. If she does I’m stopping her and doing what my dad said and telling her to clean up her piss. Well she didn’t pee, because there was no trash can. Damn, doesn’t that suck when you have to hold it because there’s no mini trash can to pee in? She left her bag here though. I think I’m going to leave a note in there that says “really? the trash can?” and that’s it. Or I’ll put I cleaned up your pee yesterday and I don’t want to do it again. You’re not a baby or a ninty year old woman who can’t control her functions. Stop it. That really should not be acceptable.

Can I randomly say that Dads spending time with their kids are so cute! Recently I’ve seen a lot more doing that, I won’t see the mom but here’s good old dad laughing, and goofing around with his little girl or boy. That’s my favorite. J I see a lot of that in innocent Owasso, but not Tulsa. Ha. Tulsa…. I love that place.

This is not the funny one, sorry.

Currently I am addicted to a few new things. One Travie McCoy. Good lord I love his music and him he is so effing good looking! I asked cha cha and hes only 28. Aug 5th :) I am a creeper. but I'm old enough. ;)To show you how much of a creeper, here's a picture or four of my boo Travie.

 This one to the left is currently my backround on my computer and phone. And my fave! :))

I want him to sing to me.

Mmmmmmmm.

He looks high in this one but thats okay.

His smile is the cutest!

Oh yes I am listening to his amazing voice right now. Thank you to my cousin for making his cd for me. :) You wanna know the other thing I am addicted to? That show Skins. Its a good one. No, not the uk version, that's straight up porn.  And porn is gross.

I like this version. :)

I no longer have cable so I have to watch on mtv.com or whatever it is but I like this show.  This show is intended for mature audiences only. They only bleep out the f word. but one time the bleeped out the word cum and it made me laugh! I dont know why I guess it's because they can say shit but not cum? Oh the rules of television. 

"Back in the days when I was young, I'm not a kid anymore But some days I sit and wish I was a kid again"

~ Travie.

Sometimes I do wish I was a kid again. Back when my parents were impressed with every scribble I drew. now they aren't proud of anything I do. And it pisses me off. I work over 40 hrs a week now. But no, apparently acording to my dad I have a shit job and it's not even a real job. Well good lord, where did my social life go if this job is so fake? I have now made over $300 extra just in commission just these past two weeks but no, that can't be real, and that's not imprssive or acceptable. You know I even get told I'm going to hell for working on sundays every once in awhile? I even debated working at effin Night Trips to make $500 a night just for slippin a tit. Yeah it is a strip joint. But you can just waitress and thats what I was going to do. I can hear the rumors now.  But please let me save you the trouble, here's the truth!

Wait, no. You can't have it. Cause if I gave you the truth my life would sound very boring. Keep  the rumors going. Makes me sound like I have this crazy ass cool life.  :) That I would much rather be living.

Can I tell you randomly that boys are stupid? Well and one of them is my fault. Juan is a douche. I hate that name always have that should have givin it away. But no. Whatever I'm done with his pathetic I'm so amazing self.  One guy i cant talk about on here. I have a feeling he'd see. Same with the third. haha But the fourth and five-er yeah, I'll tell all. :) Well theres this one guy I went on a date with, reluctently. I wasn't attracted to him at all. Still aren't.  He's just not my type. Any way he was drinking beer the whole time, that shit stinks. Bad. Especially on breath. gag. So I couldn't even turn to him when I talked. And that was like the highlight of the night. Let's go to the other guy. We used to mess around. And people are always like "oh you might start crushin if you do that." I was like "hell naw (okie accent) i'm a heartless bz". "That wont happen to me." Even though it's already happened to me once before, we don't talk any more at all now. Unless I say something That he would have never expected, but enough about that guy, back to the one I was talking about, the mess around guy. I used to have feelings for him, I really did, then once I asked him if he had ever liked me more then a friend and he straight up said no, in this voice like are you effing stupid? Shortly after I moved to Utah.... when I moved back we started talking again and messing around again. And I reallized I still kinda liked him. But he doesnt like me, I'm just another weekend mess around. I dont mean anything I guess. I dont need him to tell me that again. I can tell just by the way he says things to me. Sad that I still like him. And want to be with him. We really dont talk any more. Dear lord if he ever read this..... hahaha that would be quite the fml. But I dont care. My fault I guess... now I shall go back and correct the errors I catch. That took too long.... The funny blog will be above this.

Wake your mind up.

So I think the last time I wrote a blog I was bitching. Don’t fret there shall be little bitching in this one! But no guaranties.  Can I just randomly say that I am having random itching attacks and they favor that one place I can never reach on my back.  Fml. Okay so I have a pretty great job right now. I work at At The Beach Tanning Superstore! It’s pretty fun and I get free tanning so yes I am getting color! Actually, I am tanner than everyone in my family right now. Boo ya bitch! J For all those who made fun of me, In your mother effing faces! Excuse me, I’m sorry, I’m really such a lady! Yeah, I suppose I like that song…. I have seen a bunch of my old friends now and met a few new ones. It’s all just so fun! I went to the District the other night with Amanda and Britany. We danced the night away! Oh lord I love those girls, we had so much fun!  Oh gosh! All the things I could say! Let’s just say it’s been an eventful month J It’s great.  Kid Cudi, I am in love with you. End of story. Marry me? Can I just say his lyrics are amazing?

What up? How is everyone doing?
You are now in the world I am ruling
Take a minute to adjust for the wondrous
Clusterfuck of fun and enchantment
I promise you some Generation next shit
Speak for the silent who are left with
Parallel levels in a dark, dark place
Tricked all you niggas to a dark, dark fate
And guided you all with a smile up on my face
As the sun kisses us on the foreheads gently
Gentle with the drugs, heavy with the love
And my speeches onstage rock mountains from a club
Money doesn't move me except on the literal
G4 flights, now we're off to Australia
I wanna see more of the world,
these are more than just words, these are facts from a winner.

This is a journey, into the horizon
You can see past, if its real to you
we can meet on the other side,
on the other side
This is a journey, into the horizon
You can see past , if its real to you
then we can meet on the other side,
on the other side

What up? How is everyone feeling?
I hope you understand what you're hearing
Take a minute to roll up for the wondrous
Clusterfuck of darkness and evil
I will paint the Yin and the Yang for ya
And my jeans are Dior for the love of skinny's
Upgraded, aided to the T
Work hard, makin' sure I don't become a memory
Hard to press on the memories remember me
And they always find the perfect moment
High speed my momentum won't slow up none
Lost in the wind, I've lost all my friends
Maybe they were never meant to be acquainted
Money seems to make everything tainted
Everybody mad cause they stuck where I knew 'em last
Took what I wanted and I did it all blunted.
Oh oh

This is a journey. J Oh baby can I just have him? These aren’t even his best lyrics. The song is Scott Mescudi Vs The World by the way. Look up all his songs though. Kid Cudi is amazing.  Well I am off to bed. I’m gonna go hot tubbing tomorrow!  Hell yeah! Be jealous!

Just Bitching. But I'll make it funny.

I would like to start this out as a few letters.

Dear Bruno Mars,
Please catch that granade, Jump in front of that train, Throw your hand on that blade and please stop writing music. Or just call the radio stations and tell them to not play your song 3 times every hour. That would be great, Thanks.


Dear Black eyed peas,
GET A NEW SINGLE!!!!!! I'm sorry, but this Dirty bit crap you think is a song, isn't and is quite annoying. It is too repetitive and compleatly no talent. I'm sure i can auto tune myself copying someone elses song and then give it to someone else to mix as well. Not hard. Show me a song with real talent. Thanks.


Dear local radio station,
Get a new playlist. I swear you only get enough songs to fill an hour and then randomize them. In fact, I can name off the songs that make up majority of your playlist right now.
1. Firework- Katy Perry
2. Granade- Bruno Mars
3. Dirty bit - Black eyed peas
4. We r who we r - Ke$ha
5. Raise your glass - Pink
6. Stereo love - Edward Maya
7.  A random song  only played every 2-3 hrs with the choices between Im coming home- Diddy Or Black and yellow- Wiz K.
8. one of the two Rihanna songs that are popular you know...
9. a far east movement song usually rocketeer.
10. December by Taylor Swift.
And now repeat!!! Every hour! Seriously, i am sure these are not the only artists out there so lets get some variety. Thanks.

Well. Thats about all thats really bothering me. EXCEPT!

Dear Nikky Manaj,
SHUT THE HELL UP!!!


Okay. I think thats it. :)

Home life so far.

So I decided to not come back to Utah. Here I am in Oklahoma. It’s pretty nice seeing everyone again. I missed this place a lot more then i thought i would. So far I have had one job interview but turned in more applications. My dad reminds me every day how horrible it is that i don’t have a job yet. How many days after Christmas is it? Yeah, let’s think about that. At one point i think it was the day after i got home I went around to see all my friends, My dad was quite upset with that. Then the next day he says, "Geez Kirsten, don’t you have any friends at all?" I was sitting on my bed at that moment in time and he had just gotten back from taking majority of my siblings out to their friends’ houses. Last night I was going to my friend’s house, because yes, I, Kirsten, have friends. Shocker. Yeah, apparently i am 16 again and need to leave him all the information before i leave. You should have seen him last night! Ridiculous! It was like i said,... "Hey dad I'm going out to do drugs now and possibly have drinks with this guy i barely know all by myself, tootles." when in reality i said, "Bye dad I'm going to Alex McCafferys to help dye her hair." .....sound alike at all?  Then when i go to hang with them he complains that i am wasting my time and wasting gas. Make up your mind father. Can i have friends or not!? While i was at Alex's he had told me to call at 10:30 so i did, and he freaks out saying, "Why aren’t you home yet!?" well, i am calling like you said to. "But you should have been home by now, give me a time est.!" Well we have to finish Alex's hair and it’ll take me around 25ish minuets to get home so I’m gonna go with an hour and a half. "Kirsten, That’s midnight." Yes dad. "I want you home alive tonight." Dad, I'm sure the family i am with will not kill me. "That’s not what i mean" ......Whatever dad see you then! So my dad now thinks that if i am out past midnight, i will die. There is no ifs ands or buts, i will die. Thank goodness i got home 20mins before midnight last night. Just 20 minutes more and I would have come home dead. Phew! I suppose staying over at someone’s house is out of the question now. Darn. I think it is quite stupid that they are treating me like this, let’s face it, i am 18 years old. Legally I can be out past the city curfew. I have nothing to do right now because I'm not sure if i would be allowed to do anything with my nonexistent friends that waste my time and gas...... good thing i have real friends that do nothing of the sort! I can’t wait till summer..... I want a job. I want to save up all my money and get my own place, but then i wouldn’t have a car. Because the car i drive is “My dad’s car that he lets me drive”, that is the official title. Don’t get me wrong, i like being home but the "I think you’re on drugs" thing got old Jr year. Why its starting back up again I will never know because they don’t talk to me about it. Ever. Just saying, I would take a pee test right now, you wouldn’t find anything in me! Meanwhile, my brothers are in California for New Year’s. What am I to do for New Year’s?   You guessed it, I’m thinking nothing because obviously I would end up dead because New Year’s in fact takes place at midnight and sometimes, surprisingly, can last longer than that! And we all know that’s just not safe. I hope everyone else has a great Friday night…. Thanks for reading my bitching. I’m sure I am allowed to use that word for my dad uses it all the time, and let’s not forget, that I am also 18.

My letter to Mos.

Dearest Kelsey, Mos,

          I am currently in the airport, very bored and quite stuck in one place. This so called carry-on weighs too much! The handle has broken so I can no longer carry it as normal. Oh, and the best part is I cannot go anywhere without all of my bags at all times; therefore, I am pretty much stuck unless I want to literally drag this Hawaii bag with me. No chance there so I shall be holding my pee till I arrive in Tulsa; Four more hours to go; Joy.  Well, I shall tell you what I see right now. There is a lady having a hoot with her little yorkie. How did that happen? I thought you had to put animals in the underbelly of the plane. I suppose not for she is a walking example. To be fair it is quite a cute dog. The girl directly behind me insists on constantly fixing her hair, it has been hitting me for quite some time now.

I spy with my little eye an Auntie Anne’s and I would very much like a pretzel but seeing as the little baggage problem I told you about has not been fixed I shall not get a pretzel. I will just stare at the sign, with a few tummy rumbles here and there. I have just realized they have changed the gate on me so I will have to move eventually. Thank goodness it is only one gate away from me. I also found out there is a flight boarding right this very second for Tulsa and of course it is my favorite airline, Southwest.

Oh! Bryson, Catherine, and my daddy shall be at the airport. Seeing as Tanner, Taylor, and Ethan have finals tomorrow, my mother thought it would be best if they got some sleep. But do not fret Mos! I have a feeling they shall be up all night waiting to greet me.

I have been invited to seminary tomorrow already. I might just have to go in order to get the car in order to get to tech! I suppose I shall do it, but I do so hate the morning traffic in Owasso. The schools are far too close to each other so the traffic gets rather heavy.

Just a random thought, why is it so much easier to write you a letter than an essay? It’s possibly because I can use my thoughts in your letter but in an essay I can never have my input or opinion in the paper. Yes, I suppose that’s it. I just sent you a picture of the water that I am drinking. Right after I pressed send it fell through the crack of the chair. Not cool. I can’t reach it. Geez. Are you ever gonna text me back!? I am thirsty. I can see the water but I cannot reach it, accursed connected airport chairs.

There is this annoying beeping noise Mos, and I have no idea where it’s coming from. I think it’s funny to watch people walk across the floor that moves, the thing that’s like a flat escalator. Those people look like speed demons and they are entertaining indeed. The lady with the dog just got up. She has the dog in a little basketball hoop looking thing tied to her front. That poor dog looked terrified. It also has a strangely long neck. I think I shall call this dog giraffe. This name is quite suitable for it, believe you me! I don’t know if the dog is actually cold but this lady who I will now name Gretchen, is putting that red blanket on the dog over and over again. Gretchen must really love Giraffe for she talks to him a lot; Maybe a little too much. Gretchen just shushed Giraffe, I don’t think Giraffe has made a peep that I have heard; Poor Giraffe.

This looks like a good place to make a new paragraph for Gretchen has stopped the shushing of giraffe. I will update you on them though, for they are quite the traveling pair. I want Giraffe for my own. I was going to say something about being so close to home that people are wearing OU shirts, then as the little boy got closer I noticed it was a Cardinals shirt. (Off went Giraffe’s blanket, I bet he is shivering his little tush off.) A man in an orange shirt just sneezed. And someone on the TV just missed a touchdown. What a waste of that run.   There is a woman that just walked in and the first thing that came to my head was Purple Pumpkin. Please don’t ask me why, I do not fully understand this either.

I feel that I should move over now, there is room. But at the same time I look at all the stuff I have to carry and I am thinking I will be able to hear the announcements from here. I hope I can. Purple pumpkin is reading a book by David Something and snacking. Oh my is she snacking. I have a feeling they are Goldfish. Oh gosh, was I way off, they are chocolate turtles.  I still see my water, I really want it. I am quite thirsty, stupid chairs. The girl that was hitting me with her hair is apparently secretly getting married, oh the joys of having a loud conversation everyone can hear. And a woman dressed in a red jogging suit just walked by me with her little boxer dog. I suppose Gretchen is not the only living example any longer. Do you think you have to put your dog under the scanner or have the security officer feel the dog up for random dangerous items? And couldn’t a dog be a weapon? Ever heard the term SICK EM BOY! I guess they don’t worry about silly things like that they have bigger things to worry about like water turning into a bomb or something like that.

I don’t blame them I mean anything is possible. Purple pumpkin gave a foreign boy a 50 cent piece so he could phone home or order a pizza, who knows!  There is another woman who just sat down and the first thing I thought was Piglet! I think this is from her hot pink fleece vest. Well pardon me for a min. I have to move now…

I have moved and there are some new people, the one that caught my eye is a boy, not just any boy. He is argyle sweater boy with plaid underneath! But for sake of my typing we’ll just call him Argyle. Now Argyle is also reading a book I can tell by looking at him but I can also tell because he reads it out loud; very loud. But do not fear Mos, this book is almost done. I want to bet that I will be sitting by him on the plane. The most tragic thing happened, I had to leave my water behind in gate B25. Here I am in gate B23 still very thirsty. I forgot to mention that I cut my lip earlier with a piece of salt water taffy. I do not fully understand this either. But I would just like to say it is bothering me, very much so right now.

I think Argyle just finished his book. What is he to do now? He has Dasani. I am jealous. An iPod? Oh good choice Argyle! I wonder what’s on there. I am going to make a wild guess and say that it’s more “hardcore” stuff because Argyle has his ears gauged and his shoes look more like the shoes for kids that listen to that. Don’t argue with me. Of course he could be listening to Barney is a dinosaur or freaking Ke$ha! I’m not positive and will never know for sure till I ask him. I don’t think we shall ever find out Mos.    Sorry I just don’t feel like randomly asking people stuff tonight. Weird huh? I need chapstick. Now. I love Carmex. The cut on my lip is burning a bit but don’t fear, it is a good burn!

Argyle has rolled up the plaid to a half sleeve that is quite the look. This Free Wi-Fi for all is not working, or I would be on Facebook or something like that. I have debated about taking pictures around me so I can give you a visual as well but I have a feeling people would get offended, maybe even feel threatened, who knows. I want to listen to Kid Cudi right this very second. I have currently started up my iTunes, with no headphones. That’s right I am the inconsiderate jerk right now. I think it’s low enough though. I honestly think I am the only one that can hear it. As I am listening to Ke$ha’s song Crazy Beautiful Life, I want you to take her advice and get a little high on life. Electric Feel is next, I don’t really have any advice on life from that song, give me a min. though and I bet I can make up something.

Why are people who work in airlines always foreign? I don’t mean like the skin color or anything I am talking about the accents. They are great and all and I wish I had one but when you make announcements on a plane or talk to me on a phone I want to understand you.  Oh my gosh! I didn’t even notice this boy over in the corner! He is wearing an ugly Christmas sweater; and has many colors surrounding him that I am not quite sure about.

We are supposed to be boarding this plane in twenty min. or less and I have yet to see the plane I am boarding. I also just answered my phone and talked semi loud while listening to iTunes, oh yeah! I am one of those people we all love to hate! The flight attendants are currently freaking out about free food from the pilot. One of the flight attendants has quite a laugh, remember the video we watched last night with Glo-zell? That’s all I have to say. i now see the plane I will finish this in a few hours when I get to Oklahoma. It is now chilly in here. Argyle keeps looking at me, I do hope he is not listening to Whitechapel and thinking too much of the lyrics. Wait, that might be too much for him. Well I would like to tell you about my flight. This pretty attractive man sat beside me! But he was blonde, sorry. He is a wildlife fireman, something like that so he travels a lot. That morning he had been in Costa Rica. Well he was pretty cool I guess, he sped off the plane as fast as he could! Excited to see his family, I think not! 

Well now I am home. A huge group of people just came by to sing carols. I mean like around 50ish people! Oh Maggie peed she was so excited to see me. And yeah, that’s life so far! Though, I did go to tech! It was quite fun!  Then I saw Tanner, learned a disturbing fact about Kolby and Benton. Though I guess it was expected. Oh I do hope they don’t read this. I currently hear my daddy laughing at a movie. I have missed his laughs and hugs.

I miss you Mos! I yelled out to day saying, “MOS?!”, but you didn’t answer. I think I will miss that a lot, if not the most. Now I shall tell you all the things I will miss and we will take a walk down memory lane. Do you remember one of the first nights we were there I got out my scrapbook and actually showed you it? Holy crap! I am so lame! How about the time I left you that note to join me at the twilight show in pioneer park, then I got home before you? But in the while I got lost. I still don’t understand how I got back before you, you weren’t lost. Oh my gosh! The Greek festival! We thought we would find some cute guys there, and there wasn’t one. Remember the first time we had a “sleepover” then we started trading off nights for whose bed we would sleep in? I hated your bed because it was so cold! So, what movie are we gonna watch tonight? I think I watched more movies with you then anyone else! Including my family! Don’t worry, that doesn’t sound too bad right? Remember those days we went to church, and sat alone? I am so glad I had you to sit by. You will have to tell me how our favorite construction site comes along.

Oh gosh, do you remember when Ali moved in and we took her phone and laughed at it for what seemed like days!? Remember all those times we could hear each other in the shower screaming because the water would turn freezing in one second? Oh how I hated that shower.

I will miss so much! You were the best first roommate anyone could ever ask for! I love you! And I miss you so much! Thank you for being there for me and dealing with my saltyness or just my weirdness. And thank you for the letter! I love your letters! J

Love, Kirsten! Mos.

I don't care.

But in reality I do.
I haven't written a blog in awhile and I'm feeling kinda down today so why not right?
Bring me the horizon's new cd is playing and I am basically alone in this acurssed house.
Well, besides the regular people that never come out of their rooms, ali is at work, so is kelsey, (mos), and haleighs best friend ty is here so they went to the mall. Now back to the story.
                I think I have said before that sometimes i really dont care but there are other times where i do care but there is no way in hell im gonna let any one see that and there are times when i care and you will know. I worry about how communication works these days. It's terrible, it sucks. I could say something like I have more opertunities in Oklahoma and it is translated into, I dont care about you any more i'm leaving. So lets chat about the Oklahoma thing, it goes along with alot of this. I am failing classes and I know for a fact that I will fail next semester if i stay here. So what did i do? I told my dad i was failing and not having a pleasent time here. Why? He deserves the truth, he was paying for my college and I wont be wasting any more of his money. Yes. I am a waste of money. Yes i am a waste of that widows mite yes i am a bitch sometimes yes i do complain other times yes sometimes i am grumpy and yeah i speak my mind and am honest. But that doesnt mean you have to tell me im a waste. or remind me im a waste of that widows mite. Sometimes i dont even care when people call me a bz or bitch. But in all honesty i have heard that more times  here than i have my whole life, and its catching up to me and slowing me down. i have to say if people keep calling me this, thats all i shall be til i leave. THIS IS NOT ME. I dont know why utah, but i have become a bitch living here. I'm really not like that. Thank God i am leaving this place maybe i can go back to me and not be so stresses or tense. I have never wanted to cry so many times here. Thats why i dont talk out my feelings, i will cry. I hate crying, its pointless in my eyes and weak. I dont want people to see me like that. well i dont know what else to put. im done. im gonna go finish packing.
There is a Hell Believe me I've seen it, There is a heaven, let's keep it a secret.

"If I let you in, you'd just want out.
If I tell you the truth, you'd vie for a lie.
If I spilt my guts, it would make a mess we can't clean up.
If you follow me, you will only get lost."

~BMTH

:)

Great lyrics. By the way, I recomend this cd. :)
I feel better now. Writing helps me. Talking it out, not so much.
Oh and dont get me wrong I will miss certain people here because i love and care about them but i am not ment to be here. Just found that out a little late.