Ellie Goulding. Latest Obsession.

Guns And Horses.

You're so quiet
But it doesn't phase me
You're on time
You move so fast, makes me feel lazy

And let's join forces
We've got our guns and horses
I know you've been burned by every fire is a lesson learned

I left my house
I left my clothes
Door wide open
Heaven knows
You're so worth it, you are

But I wish I could feel all it for you
I wish I could be it all for you
If I could erase the pain
And maybe you'd feel the same
I'd do it all for you
I would

Let's tie words
'Cause they amount to nothing
Play it down
Pretend you can't take what you've found
But you found me
On a screen you sit at permanently

I left my house
I left my clothes
Door wide open
Heaven knows
You're so worthy, you are

But I wish I could feel all it for you
I wish I could be it all for you
If I could erase the pain
And maybe you'd feel the same
I'd do it all for you
I would

It's time to come clean
And make sense of everything
It's time that we found out who we are
Cause when I'm standing here in the dark
I see your face in every star

But I wish I could feel all it for you
I wish I could be it all for you
If I could erase the pain
And maybe you'd feel the same
I'd do it all for you
I would
I'd do it all for you, I would

Can I just be her? Or atleast have her voice.

Shiz Happens

Alright. So the other night I get a call from my bestie Amanda. Her car had broken down on the cursed Hwy 20. I personally have always hated that road. Any way I go down there to help Amanda, we get in my car and go to the QT down the street and put gas in a little gas can., go back to her car and put in the gas. Her car starts up! Yay! So I go back to my car and it wont start..... It killed itself. The battery could take  no more. Amanda looks in her car for jumper cables, cause they are always in there! Well tonight at two in the morning they aren't. So we had to go to her house in her car to get the jumper cables. While on our way to get back to my car the song walking on sunshine comes on. The original, good version. This one Walking on Sunshine . Now doesn't that sound like the world is taking a crap on us and making fun of us? ......yeah we sang along anyway! Cause it's one of the best songs ever!  Take that world! Well we got back to my car and jumped it. After three times of jumping it my car finnaly stays on and works. Happy ending, we both made it home!
Part two! The next day! 
So Saturday we were both bored. Finally at like six we figured we would go out to eat. We headed up to chedders because I had never been there before. While on our way there it starts poring down rain, after a few months with out rain we needed it but really? all at once? that was had to drive in. Oh well It felt good. Of course being a Saturday night and getting there at 6:30 it's packed! We waited a good 25min. And finally got a booth, facing the window. Which was funny cause I was saying how thats what I wanted and that we would probably get a table in the middle of the room. But the food was good :) I approve of Chedders now. After Chedders we went to Starship records On 15th And Lewis. I love that store. Really I do it's just not in the best area. Like I would never go there alone at night. So I was looking at some shiz and this Effing Juggelo freak comes up to me and was all like Hi, Youre really pretty whats your name? Normally I wouldnt have cared but he had wads of cash in his hand. He thought I was an effing prostitute. He continues to try and get me to go to this party because It's his friends birthday and there will be jegger shots blahblahblah and he keeps calling me beautiful and sweet talking. Honestly I felt so dirty at that point. He was very persistant and even got his female friend to try and get my number. Gross. I gave them a fake name and everything. I knew he thought I was a prostitiute. It was just awful. How degrading is that? Thanks alot random douche. Like I said on my facebook, You better have more money then Bill Gates and Oprah, combined On the spot, in cash bitch. Im not a prostitute. Needless to say we got what I needed and got the eff outta there. That has never happened to me in that store before. I love that place.  But really?
Part three! So far today.....
So this morning I woke up to Why aren't you at church whats wrong with you? Now put that in every word form possible and repeat 20Xs each. I finnaly got so Tired of it and told Taylor, Ethan and my dad to shut the hell up. I hate it when they do that. They always judge me and assume they are better then me becuase they go to church. Newsflash you aren't. And now I shall go to Julies and make dinner for them :)

Oklahoma sometimes turns out to be a pretty cool place.

I hate to admit it but sometimes Oklahoma can really amaze me. It can be random yellow lightning or a freaking tunnel made of trees or some beautiful view of some stupid piece of land that just makes me want to stay in that place forever. Yes this will be a damn happy blog, next to no cussing. But it was an amazing day and I just have to share it. So there i was sitting at home bored and Amanda texts me and asks if I want to go swimming. I told her hell yeah! But that we needed to go to Bluehole. Amanda had never been to Bluehole so I told her we had to go for sure. Bluehole is about an hour away from where we live. We headed out at around two in the after noon. We saw some wierd things on our way, like a pink house, and a hotdog putting on its own mustard, and a house with potty chairs and walkers as their front yard decor. You know you're in Oklahoma when you see potty chairs and walkers as decor. Any way we got lost. We ended up on this dirt road with a billion tree tunnels! Tree tunnels are those trees that surround the road and lean over the road to where it makes a tunnel.... get it? well they are my favorite thing to drive through. Tree tunnels make me happy and appriciate nature. For some wierd reason... Well we follow this dirt road for too long and finally deside to turn around, in this rednecks yard. He sees us and asks where we're going or what we're looking for. I said We need to get to Bluehole. He steps out of his car and is wearing no shirt, and booty shorts. Shorty short shorts. Redneck. He was really nice though and told us exactly how to get to bluehole! We ended up getting there a few mins. later. Moral of the story so far as Amanda put it, Always trust rednecks in booty shorts and no shirt. Any way we get there and its just gorgeous there. There will be a picture in this general area if I get this right.... And now is the part where I will post a bunch of pictures and tell stories. underneath the picture. Jk Some of them wont have explainations becuase this is screwing up. So just look at the damn pictures and be jealous you weren't there. :) Hahaha. Over all it was a great day, That I really needed. Thank you Amanda for putting up with me! I love you! Oh and I hope you liked this Brittney. ;) This one is all for you!

BlueHole.

Shadow pictures are always a good way to go.

I am a crazy person.



lazily drifting with the current.



We got this floaty from a family whose kid cracked his head open. nbd.

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Clear water is the best. And a rare find in the OK.

 Well, Let me post this and start a new blog..... I guess I have too many pictures......

True Friends.

How does she put up with me?

These next two blogs are dedicated to two of my best friends in the intire world. People that I know will always be there for me here in Oklahoma Or where ever I end up going. The first is Amanda H. Yes. That is her on the left mooning me. And yes, That is me in a bra. We are just that good of friends. This girl right here has helped me through so much in my life.She will never know how much I appriciate her. She is alway there when ever I need her. We always start our days when we hang out by bitching to each other. I know that sounds weired but honestly I think it helps alot, we just bitch and get it out of our system. No matter how wimpy and stupid my bitching is she always listens to me. Amanda is my hero. My insparation. She has been through so much in her life and I really do look up to her. And she's gorgeous. But that's a given. We have had so many crazy times together. Like the time we got chased down by that cowboy on the highway.... or the time the old man followed us back to owasso on the high way and took pictures of us. Total creeper. Or all those photography adventures. I always made Amanda be my model for photography class. I swear everytime we go some where something out of the ordinary, creepy, or just halarious happens to us! She is seriously my best friend and I wouldn't trade her for the world. Now just to be a weirdo and end up embarrassing myself her are more pictures that always make me smile.

SunShine.

Hi I'm Queersten.

Bitches. :)

Summer time And the livin's easy.

Dear lord my hair. haha

Nose ring. I was jealous.

Summer Drives to No where.

Tanning is important.

Oh goodness. Actually, we take some nice pictures. Hopefully I'm not embarrassing Amanda. This is my best friend though. I wanted to do this because recently she helped me through something kinda big and she saw me cry. And you all know that I Do Not cry. I have told Amanda everything And I trust her with my life. I love that we have a super honest friendship, and when I say that I mean blunt. For real. We can say anything to eachother and be compleatly fine. "Kirsten, shut-up!" hahaha Okay. "No those clothes do not work, take them off and burn them!" You sure? "Yes." I'm pretty sure we have never argued or gotten into any fights. She's been a real friend to me. A true friend. Thank you for everything that you have ever done, you're the best and I love you!

I don't cry.

Family.
You tell me I dress like a slut.
Well atleast I have style.
You say I am stupid.
I have common sense.
"You're making a bad choice by hanging out with Them."
"I accept people for who they are and don't judge Them."
You're going to hell.
I'll see you there.
Why are you going inactive?
Because I don't want to be forced to believe in what you do.
Why can't you be like.......
You don't see them outside of thier "perfect" church attire.
Why don't you listen to us?
I take your words into consideration.
What is wrong with you?
I'm just finding myself, sorry you hate it.
Why don't you leave?
Believe me I want to.
Kirsten, Why do you act like this?
I guess I learned from the best.
I don't cry.
But maybe I should.



This isn't even half of what I hear all the time. I am getting so tired of this shit. Everyone needs to feel loved especially from thier family. Currently I am not getting that. All of these things that were said I have heard from my mom, dad, grandpa and brothers. Rediculous and shouldn't happen. This is not okay. People keep telling me that I can cry about it or I can just not give a fuck. Well I don't cry. And sometimes I do give a fuck. Surprise surprise, Kirsten cares. But I don't care enough to cry. Tomorrow's a new day and it will start all over again. I am a slut. I am a druggie. I am stupid. I am not wanted. I am a terrible person. Please start new rumors so I don't have to hear these ones again. They are getting old and quite frankly my dear I don't give a damn. Be creative this time though. Or donate money to the Get Kirsten out of Oklahoma Fund. If you want me gone help me out bitches. Then I will be gone so fast and you wont ever have to hear from me again. I believe this is the part I am supposed to go get high or cut myself or something..... wait, I don't really do that. Good night.

Hunter's intense therapy notes

In other words Hunters notes she took at 4am talking to me. Thought they were funny so i'll share.
*warning there are mistakes in her but we will not fix them because it makes it genuine. :)

She’s feel tired and dizzy.

Crazy girl – she makes you cry. And she’s sexy (of course)

                You love her to death. (But no interpersonal feelings)

                She’s a “man”, no problems with being a man. She has a problem with saying “cock”. Naughty word.

Her life sucks balls. Why is she a failure? She has no social life. She works over 40 hours a week.

She likes her job, because…. Amazing manager. Lots of money.

She doesn’t like her job because… “cleaning up piss”. The hours suck.

Whitney, (“Titney”) NO DRAMA, just problems.  She threating  to write her up. She doesn’t listen, she’s “fat”, she’s “fat” (AGAIN), and she’s fat and fat and rude. And fat. And she’s short.

She doesn’t like commitment. Yes to Hookups. Longest relationship, 1 month. No forreal bf.

No right boys… all them cute ones. NO COMMINTMENT. (EW)

p.s. I am a robot.

Likes to beep. Won’t stop laughing. PENISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Yes – to commitment.  (RANDOM BOY)

Blah blah blah blah blah spikey hair. Only like boys for appearance. (but funny)

Huge on appearance… Shallow. In denial.

Still in denial. Cute with a lazy eye is NOT awesome. (Lucy)

Always will be shallow. Still in denial. Crazy, thinks I can talk to possums?

The only guy she legit dated…

HATES ZAC EFRON… she’s gotta go.

“I can’t fall in love with an animal”

Travie McCoy:

Summer cabin. In the dark abyss. Catching fireflies. Next to the ocean. He turns around & slaps you. You say WHY DID YOU DO THAT? He says YO UGLY. AND STUPID. I FREAKING HATE YOU.

Random Guy with Lazy Eye:                                                                                                                    

Summer Cabin. In the dark abyss. Catching fireflies. Next to the ocean. You turn around & slap him. He says WHY DID YOU DO THAT? You say YO UGLY. AND STUPID. I FREAKING HATE YOU. He says, girl I aint got no money, I aint got no car to take you on a date. I can’t even buy you flowers. But together we can be the perfect soul mates. Talk to me girl. & you say, baby it’s alright now you aint got to flaunt it for me. You know that you can still touch my love it’s free. We can work without the books just you and me. Thuggin it out until we get it right. And he says, hey baby I’m going to get some surgery work done to fix my lazy eye. & I just joined the NBA and I’ll be getting paper. You say, I BET YOU CAN’T SING THOUGH. He says, naaa I just got a record deal with chris brown baby. We be gettin paper boo.

Which would you choose            

I'm not sure if this is finished.

This is dedicated to my Utah roomies, My Mos, Haleigh, and Ali. Before I start I would like to say that since I no longer live with them, this blog shall be full of grammatical errors. Deal with it! J

 So I don’t really know where to start, maybe I should say where I am because it’s not home. I am currently at work, there is no one here. I am listening to 90’s music and singing along to my childhood.

 Funny story about work yesterday, I traded shifts with another girl, I was supposed to open so when we switched I closed, damn I am the story master! No detail left unsaid! Well I had been hanging out with Amanda and Hunter the night before and we were partying it up ya know Facebook creepin very late at night. So I agreed, I was like yeah I’ll trade! Just more time to creep on people and girl talk, or whatever. Hunter is not yet 18 or I’m sure we would’ve gone to the District night club. Mmmmm.  Any way I thought we were all set and I get a call at 8am saying, your stores not open. I was like fuhhhh. So I jumped out of the bed like a freakin super hero on an adrenaline high (no sleep will do that) And raced to work! I had a late open. Poop. My first one ever. But I don’t blame the other girl at all she’s been having a very hard time lately. I still love that girl!

 So my morning went like this, late open, then I turned into a CNA.  Do you know what cna’s do? Well they clean up all the bodily fluids of old people who cannot control themselves or their bladder. This sweet lady came in (50 years old…..) I got her all set up in her tanning bed and sent her to the room. No one else was coming in so I decided to creep on her comments in the computer. Of course FIVE of the comments were “make sure to take out the trash can in her room she pees in them.” Can I add right here that these trash cans are little baby trash cans? The ones you have to put your foot on a pedal to open….. I was like fuhhhhh. She best not piss in this trash can.

Meanwhile my dear sweet dad comes in and brings me breakfast. Homemade chocolate chip pancakes. J <3 love him.

So we’re chattin’ it up about random shiz while I was reading these comments and I go dad…. Who the hell thinks its okay to pee in a trash can? His answer “Tanner, or wait, was that Bryson?” (My younger brothers.) So we laughed and I was like no dad for real, look at these comments. He read them and said, “Kirsten if she does you need to call her (in case she leaves) and tell her she needs to get her butt back here and clean up her piss.” So I said dad I don’t know how to do that. How would you tell someone, I mean doesn’t everyone know that’s inappropriate and discussing?

  No this lady did not understand this extraterrestrial conception. I mean she’s the normal one here, why doesn’t everyone just pee in trash cans? Good lord it’s just so much easier than walking 7 doors down to have a real full sized toilet.  I have to admit though, these things are small, and she had to have some talent…. Unless she was really a man. Hahahaha! What a laugh!

NO but for real after she left I checked the trash can and there was trash in it and I didn’t see any liquid. I was happy, and then I took a closer look and saw droplets on the paper that was in there…. I took the bag and began to lift it…. It was heavy with effin’ piss. The trash that was in there had floated to the top covering the pee like haha you can’t see me and you’ll never know who did this or why it smells like piss. Well I found your trick immature BZ. I Kirsten Williams had to clean up an old woman’s piss because she could not walk 7 doors down to the toilet. Oh and I mentioned before that this was her 6^th time doing it. Right?  I work in a tanning salon BZ, not a freakin’ nursing home. I refuse to clean up piss again. It’s wrong and gross. Besides I’m not even licensed to clean up biohazards material. END!

My first customer of the day finally came in, two hours after I get here; she’s one of my favorites. So nice and never pees in trash cans! Well now that we’re on the subject of strange things that happen to me at work, let’s go to when I worked in Tulsa stores for two weeks. (I think I shall draw pictures for this blog just for you guys because I have been a slacker.) But I will do those when I arrive home.

So. Tulsa stores are very different. Let me give you an example, in general Owasso is all oh I love you, we’re residential and peaceful and nothing goes down and we just have a movie theater and bowling alley for entertainment , keepin it safe! J Now Tulsa, Tulsa is more like, “don’t give me attitude I’ve got my own!  Boom Bitch stay outta my f****n’ way! I am a total bad ass and do whatever I want and don’t give a “bad word that shall be censored” Clubbin’!” ;)  (Winking smile cause Tulsa is a flirty slut.) Haha Tulsa….. I heard this week that it’s the 28^th most violent city in the U of S. Fun fact for ya.

 Well, I was at the 21^st and Yale store just Chilin. My permanent store is Owasso but someone quit so I got to cover her shifts. Back round story complete! I swear.

So here I was in one of the Tulsa stores (21st) and this lesbian couple…. Partner? Comes in. one of the girls wants to do a regular tan then go into a spay tan, that is common so she and her girl get out and the other one goes into the spay tan. The spay tan only takes like one min. she pops back up and they’re talking, the girl that came out of the spray tan hadn’t put her bra back on… besides announcing it to everyone you could tell. She proceeds to tell her girl toy…. (Gag) that the spray tan leaves no lines what so ever. For some reason she had to prove it as well. Yes, she pulled her shirt completely up and just kept her boobs up and out for everyone to see for a good min. while her girlfriend is examining them extra closely talking about biting….. Yeah… I kind of ignore from then on. Gross. But I mean if they are happy, who am I to judge, plus it makes my life seem like things actually happen. Haha.

What else happened in Tulsa…? Oh I seriously had a 20min chat with this new customer! I love her to death! She was the one that said “You know what they say about girls with big feet, it really hurts when they kick your ass.” Oh Miss Josie, she was quite adorable.

Ms. Peeinthetrashcan is tanning….. There is no trash can in there with her. I’m kind of scared she’s going to pee somewhere else now. Like the floor or behind the bed. If she does I’m stopping her and doing what my dad said and telling her to clean up her piss. Well she didn’t pee, because there was no trash can. Damn, doesn’t that suck when you have to hold it because there’s no mini trash can to pee in? She left her bag here though. I think I’m going to leave a note in there that says “really? the trash can?” and that’s it. Or I’ll put I cleaned up your pee yesterday and I don’t want to do it again. You’re not a baby or a ninty year old woman who can’t control her functions. Stop it. That really should not be acceptable.

Can I randomly say that Dads spending time with their kids are so cute! Recently I’ve seen a lot more doing that, I won’t see the mom but here’s good old dad laughing, and goofing around with his little girl or boy. That’s my favorite. J I see a lot of that in innocent Owasso, but not Tulsa. Ha. Tulsa…. I love that place.